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  “Pee-Wee!” Boss yelled over to his cousin and partner in crime. “Call Taj.”

  Taj was a mechanic who handled all of Boss and Pee-Wee’s vehicles. He was very reliable. He was also low key. Taj knew how to keep his mouth shut, and Boss appreciated that. There was nothing more important in his business than discretion. That was the first thing he taught me – and it was also the most important. Keeping your mouth closed could mean the difference between life and death.

  “I saw the whole thing, Boss.” A shaky voice spoke up from the crowd. “I saw them cats, cuzz.”

  Larry was Boss’ li’l cousin who he hadn’t seen in years. He was also Marco’s little brother. I knew him from school; he was a smart kid and very mature for his age. After what happened to his older brother, his mother kept him on a very short leash. He never got to kick it with the rest of us, and that was probably for his own good. I wasn’t much of a partier, but some of my friends were. Larry wasn’t cut out for that scene. His mother knew best.

  “Did you know ‘em?” Boss put his arms around his cousin, then they turned their backs on the crowd for a little privacy. I didn’t even want to hear what was being said; I knew how Boss got when he was angry. It was just a car, though...I didn’t think it was that serious.

  After burying my fourteen-year-old little brother, the small things didn’t faze me anymore. I was focused on graduating from high school and getting into college. When I found out I was pregnant, I thought about quitting school, but Boss wasn’t having it. He made me give him my word that I would at least get my diploma. I did, and every day since I made him that promise I worked to keep it. It was hard balancing my home life with school, but I didn’t do it all on my own; I had Boss in one corner, and I had my mother in the other. She was so strong. Even after losing Anthony so suddenly, she was always there for me. That was the kind of mother I wanted to be...that was the kind of mother I was going to be.

  Boss and Pee-Wee dropped me off at home, then headed off on their mission. My first stop was the kitchen. I hadn’t eaten anything all day, and I was craving something sweet, but the baby wanted something salty. Two slices of Sara Lee strawberry cheesecake with a handful of Lay’s plain potato chips sprinkled on top hit the spot. Any other time, something like that would have turned my stomach. Being pregnant was a trip: I cried for no reason, and I laughed out loud at shit that wasn’t even funny. I felt like I was going crazy, but I wasn’t; I was having a baby.

  After I finished my snack, I sat down at the dining table and spent an hour on my Physics homework. Makin’ the Honor Roll was hard work, and staying on it was ever harder. I was studying all the time, and the only two things that helped me relax were my man and our overhead rain shower. Once I finished my homework, I was ready to unwind - and since Boss still wasn’t home yet, I headed straight for the shower.

  As soon as I stepped under that hot water, my problems began to melt away. It felt like heaven on earth, and everything was right with the world. For five whole minutes, I was stress-free and loving it, and I was thinking about my man when I thought I heard him walking through our house.

  “Boss, baby, I’m in the shower!” I yelled out, trying to tempt him to join me. “If you wash my back, I’ll wash yours.”

  I waited for him to reply, but he didn’t. Something wasn’t right; I got that feeling again: it was the same one I got the night Anthony was murdered. I didn’t like it, but I was learning to trust it.

  I turned around to open the shower door and saw two shadowy figures standing just outside the glass. I didn’t know what to do. There was nowhere to run and nowhere to hide. The only thing I could think to do was fall to my knees and cover my head; a few seconds later, I was thankful I did. One loud pop echoed throughout the bathroom as the glass from the shower door rained down on me. I couldn’t believe it: somebody had just shot at me in my own shower...

  Chapter 24

  Boss

  The first thing I noticed when we pulled into the driveway was the front door: it had been kicked in. I got an instant flashback of the day I found Jazz after Ren raped her; that nigga was still number one on my most wanted list.

  I jumped out of the truck while it was still in motion and rushed towards what was left of the front door.

  “Meesha!” I shouted at the top of my lungs. “Baby, where you at?”

  The house was fucked up. There was a stinking-ass stream of piss on the carpet and all over the furniture. Our flat screen TVs were ripped off the walls, my all-in-one HP computer was smashed, and so was Meesha’s Dell laptop. I was pissed, but that material shit could be replaced. The only thing that really mattered was finding wifey; as long as she was alive, we could start over.

  When I finally made my way upstairs, I found an even bigger mess. Our mattress was sliced damn near in two halves, all the furniture in our bedroom was smashed and broken, and shit was thrown everywhere - but still no Meesha. I started to wonder if they had my baby, and the thought drove me crazy. When I bent down to look under the two parts of a mattress that used to be one bed, I noticed something shiny on the bathroom floor. The closer I got, the worse it looked. There was glass everywhere, and when I rounded the corner and got the full picture, I noticed that the entire shower door was gone.

  “Pee-Wee!” I hollered for my cousin. “Pee-Wee! Nigga, I need yo help!”

  He was there within seconds. I saw his face when he first laid eyes on Meesha; he thought the same thing I did: he thought she was dead.

  “She breathin’?”

  “I don’t know...I’m too fuckin’ scared to check.”

  “Boss...” Meesha’s weak voice cried out for me. “Boss, it hurts.”

  I got busy and started picking shards of glass off her back. She was bleeding like crazy, but I couldn’t get her to a hospital until I could first get her out of the shower. Pee-Wee joined in without me even having to ask him. Even though he cut his hands a dozen times, he didn’t stop trying to help me get her free. Meesha was perfectly calm and still. She was the only thing keeping me calm; if she died, she might as well have taken me with her. For the first time in I don’t know how long, I prayed to the God I’d given up on years ago. After everything He put me through, He owed a nigga one...all I needed was one.

  Chapter 25

  Meesha

  I was sick of the hospital. My back and neck were cut up so bad, I had to have fifty-two stitches. I was just glad the baby was okay. Boss fussed over me nonstop, but I didn’t mind; he was just worried about me. As long as he was with me, I was fine. I also knew he wasn’t out trying to get revenge on whoever trashed our home and shot up our shower. I understood the game: his enemies came at me as a way to get at him.

  I was tired, both physically and emotionally, and all I wanted to do was get some sleep; the only way I was going to be able to do that, though, was if Boss stayed by my side the entire night.

  I woke up every hour on the hour just to make sure Boss was still there, and he was every time. The pain medicine the nurse kept injecting my IV with was good; I couldn’t feel anything. Anthony visited me twice that night in my dreams. I missed my brother so much. His death was as senseless as it got. Who takes someone’s life over a couple of rocks? That’s why I didn’t fuck with drugs. I knew what Boss did and how he got down, but I also knew he wouldn’t be hustling for the rest of his life; my baby was too smart for that. Even if no one else saw the good in him, I always did.

  The next morning, I was discharged. Boss didn’t want me back at the house, so he checked us into the Chase Park Plaza hotel under aliases. I did everything in my power to keep him from leaving; I knew what he was thinking even when he didn’t. Somebody was gonna take the fall for every last stitch in my back. It wasn’t what I wanted, but Boss was the boss: whatever he said was the way it went; nobody questioned it, and nobody disobeyed it. I might have still been a Boss Bitch in training - but I knew when to speak my mind, and I knew when to fall back. This was one of those instances when it was best for me to keep
my mouth shut. I wasn’t punking out; I was just letting my man be the man – and in my eyes, there was nothing at all wrong with that.

  Chapter 26

  Boss

  Once I was sure Meesha was safe, I hit the streets with Pee-Wee in search of a bitch ass nigga named Face who liked to prey on defenseless women. Pee-Wee knew a lot of cats from Grape Street, so he knew all their hangouts. He also knew where Face’s babymama lived; he’d been fucking Sabrina for the last two years. Face didn’t know, but Pee-Wee could have cared less. Nobody put fear in my nigga - especially not Face. Sabrina had told him a long time ago how Face was hooked on heroin and how he was real tough when he was on it but turned into a straight bitch when his high wore off. He had to be high to go up in my house; no nigga in his right mind was dumb enough to do some shit like that.

  Pee-Wee parked in the alley behind Sabrina’s house; we didn't want to draw too much attention to ourselves. Since my cousin knew the house, I let him lead the way. He’d been there many times before. I kept a watch out for anything or anyone that didn't belong. Grape Street wasn't our hood, and we had to take precautions if we wanted to make it out alive.

  “That bitch ass nigga betta be here,” Pee-Wee said, raising his hand to knock on the back door.

  “Who is it?” Sabrina yelled from the other side of the thin, shabby piece of wood posing as a door.

  “It's Pee-Wee!” he shouted back.

  “Heym baby.” She opened the door and practically jumped on Pee-Wee, hugging and kissing him. Her smile disappeared, though, when she saw me. “What’s goin’ on?” she said, looking from me back to Pee-Wee.

  “Where’s Face?” Pee-Wee asked, ignoring her question.

  “Upstairs, passed the fuck out.” As she rolled her neck and put her hands up on her hips, her fear quickly turned to anger. Face was supposed to take their son to the barbershop to get a haircut but decided to get high instead.

  “He came into my house yesterday,” I began to explain the situation we had on our hands. “My girl was in the shower when he shot it up.”

  “Is she okay?” Sabrina seemed genuinely concerned.

  “She’s pregnant, her li’l brother just got murdered, and now she’s laid up with all kinds of cuts and bruises all up and down her fuckin’ back. On top of all that, now she’s afraid to go home.”

  “I’m so sorry, Boss.” She looked up at me, her chinky brown eyes filled with both concern and fear.

  “I guess I should shoot up yo crib up to get even.”

  “Boss, please don’t. I got three kids in there,” she begged and pleaded.

  “Don’t worry. I ain't no bitch nigga; I wouldn't use a woman to get revenge,” I assured her. Terrifying women was her man’s way - not mine.

  “Thank you.”

  “Sabrina,” Pee-Wee called for her attention. “You know what we gotta do.”

  “He’s upstairs. First door on the left.” She gave up her children's father just like that. It seemed like she would have given up anybody for Pee-Wee.

  “Get yo kids and take ‘em to the park for a li’l while,” I suggested. “This won’t take long. By the time you get back, we’ll be gone.”

  Doing as she was told, Sabrina went and got all three of her kids, then walked them six blocks to the nearest park. Pee-Wee and I waited until they were gone, then entered the house. We walked upstairs, and just as Sabrina said, we found Face in the first bedroom on the left hand side. He was fully dressed - shoes and all - and passed out across the bed. I raised my 9mm and fired it one time up into the ceiling.

  “What the fuck?!” That nigga damn near jumped out of his skin. His eyes got as big as two baseballs when he saw me standing over him – and he immediately knew what the deal was: it was time to pay the piper.

  “You fucked with the wrong nigga's gal,” I warned him, “now you get to die.”

  Pow! I fired one shot into his right thigh at point blank range.

  “Fuck!” he screamed like a li’l bitch.

  “How ironic is it that I used this same gun to kill yo brother - and now I’m ‘bout to use it to kill you?” I smirked. I knew Yuk had a brother; I just didn’t think the muthafucka was stupid enough to try and avenge his death.

  “Fuck you!” Face tried his best to come across as hard. “I coulda killed that bitch just like you killed my brotha - but I didn’t.”

  “Fuck yo dope fiend-ass brotha!” I yelled as an image of Meesha crying her eyes out at Ant’s funeral played in my mind like a movie. The time for fun and games was over. As I raised my gun and shot him in the other thigh, all the hate and rage I had inside came bubbling to the surface. Suddenly, I saw Ren's face and wished it was him bleeding on that bed.

  “Fuck!” Face yelled out in even more pain than before. “Pee-Wee, me and you go way back. You just gonna let yo crazy-ass cousin kill me?”

  Me and Pee-Wee looked at each other, then exploded into laughter. Face didn't see what was so funny; he thought we were both out of our damn minds.

  “You wanna tell him, or should I?”

  “You go ahead, cuzz,” Pee-Wee gave me the go ahead.

  “You stupid muthafucka. He been fuckin’ yo babymama for the last two years.”

  “What?” Face looked so shocked, I almost felt sorry for the nigga. “I’ma kill that bitch.”

  I raised my 9mm and shot him in his gut. He yelled out in agony. I heard that the stomach was the most painful place a person can get shot - and from the sounds of the screams coming from Face, I must have heard right.

  “I’m sorry, man! Please don’t kill me!” Face began to beg and plead for his life - just like his brother did when he stared down the barrel of the exact same gun.

  “It’s too late for all that shit now.” I fired one flawless shot and watched his head explode the same way Yuk’s did when I ended his pitiful life. Fucking with me was one thing, but these niggas were going to learn that fucking with Meesha was a deadly game - one that no one had survived so far.

  Chapter 27

  Meesha

  A few days after the home invasion, Boss took me to meet with his realtor. Raquel Bleak was the woman who sold him first house a few years back. We only spoke for a few moments when she announced that she had the perfect place for us, and she was right: as soon as I laid eyes on the magnificent seven-bedroom luxury estate, I began to plan our future there. I loved our old house, but this one was even more fab. It was nestled in the heart of Creve Coeur County, far away from the gunshots and sirens of the hood we grew up in.

  “You like it, baby?” Boss asked me, even though he already knew the answer.

  “It’s perfect,” I beamed. “Absolutely perfect.”

  I continued to look around, not believing that I could actually one day be living in a place so grand. Even my wildest dreams weren't that extravagant. The living room was big enough to fit the entire apartment I grew up in inside, and the master bedroom was like something straight out of MTV Cribs with its enormous closets and floor-to-ceiling windows. I couldn’t believe the master bath: that tub was big enough for six people. From the window above it, I could see out to the patio leading to the outdoor kitchen, the infinity edge pool, and the hot tub...I always wanted a hot tub.

  “We’ll take it,” Boss announced to Raquel with me at his side. That made my day; hell, that made my life. I wanted to move into that house and live there forever. It had everything we’d need for the family I wanted to give Boss. I already had the baby’s room all picked out and couldn’t wait to decorate it. Life was good.

  The price tag on our dream was a hefty one million, six hundred and fifty thousand dollars. Raquel’s commission would be over a hundred grand. Doing business with Malcolm Clark was always a wise decision. When he first walked into her office, nobody else wanted to deal with him; all they saw were his baggy jeans, his Timberland boots, and his flashy jewelry. But being a jeweler’s daughter, Raquel recognized the authentic diamonds and expensive platinum settings, and she took a gamble with a young dru
g dealer - and it paid off big time. Her commission from the house he brought on Lake St. Louis was over fifty grand, and the loft he kept downtown overlooking the Arch brought her in just around thirty. Boss was single-handedly putting her two kids through college; for that, she would forever be loyal to him.

  “If you need any extra security, I have a friend who breeds and trains guard dogs,” Raquel spoke in a low, hushed tone, always making sure to protect her number one client’s privacy. “He has a ranch out in Festus. Let me give you his card.” She dug around in her Gucci purse and pulled out a business card. On it was just a name and number with a paw print design. It was simple and effective, and Boss respected that.